“What you resist will persist.”
I heard these words so many times I lost count, and I also repeated them for years during my days as a facilitator for a personal growth company. They meant something different from what I hear today due to the changes and healing that took place in my life.
Honestly, I’m not sure what I thought they meant. I understood the meaning but I sure did not have a full experience of the principle. Not until recently while going through my healing journey on a whole new level. Don’t get me wrong, I received so many amazing gifts and lessons, healing and growth through the 15+ years I spent learning and teaching the principles of many personal growth teachers and I have done some deep work on shifting my thinking, identifying limiting beliefs, and rewiring my brain. However, the true meaning of this principle came to me while I dove into the next phase of my journey; trauma healing. Some people call it emotional healing, I like to refer to this process as Finding My Freedom.
Without going into too many details I will just share this. Everything in life changes. Inner change is one of these and we like it or not things will come up we have forgotten and thought we had nothing to do with anymore. Memories and the emotions we attached to them, be it a shame, guilt, fear, sadness, joy, love or anything else will surface when it is time for them to be revealed to us. There are times when memories are triggered by a new experience from our past, be it our childhood, or any other time in our lives. There are times when we only feel emotions during an experience, be it with a person, a job, or just by watching the news. Either way, we live in a world where we are surrounded by opportunities for triggers and so many of us are just walking around without the awareness of our environment being a trigger and nothing more.
Relationships, especially, are the playground for triggers and if we are not present and aware of our truth those relationships can turn into a battlefield of blame and control, judgment and arguments, disconnections and burnt bridges. All relationships are a perfect environment for old wounds to be ripped open, and many times we see the other person as the cause of our pain, disappointment, hurt, anger, shame, and fear, while they are just a conduit for a message our Higher Self, the Universe is sending us; it is time to heal!
There are times we remember things we rather not, or even have memories of things we do not have a consciousness that it is ours. Like our mind is playing tricks on us, we can have flashes of memories we do not want. Trauma comes in many forms and sizes, but they are all the same if we do not process them in a healthy way. They will stay with us and hunt us, and the more we resist to heal them the more they will persist to stick around and remind us, each moment, each day, each relationship they have a chance; I am revealing to you what needs to come to an end!
The end means the suffering of something old and no value. Its value is the message it brings you.
Old memories, remember them or not, all have a purpose, beyond your imagination telling you of what! There are gifts, lessons, growth, and richness on the other side, and each trigger is there for you to respond. Not to react to and shut off again and again, as they would not come to the surface if you are not ready for them. Some are buried so deeply, you might not even know you had the experience, as your Soul has been protecting you until you are truly ready to receive them. The time they come to your conscious is the time to face them, and know that nobody has to do this alone within them. There are so many others who knows and understands, but you have to convince yourself that it is ok to reach out and ask them.
Ask for a gentle heart to just be there and listen, for someone you feel safe with revealing the truth within. Ask for someone who has experience and knows how to hold space for you while you are facing your demons. People, places and things are all available for you to use and reach out to because my darling this was not designed just for you. To be alone in the darkest phase of your path, where the light has to come from outside of yourself. Until you feel, allow and accept the experience for its purpose and feel strong enough to stand on your own two feet. With or without you agreeing to this process, your memories of old wounds are here to help us. To help understand and reach higher grounds. To help shine the light on what needs to change within the crowd. To help you and us work together on future plans, as this is the beginning of something greater than my friend.
This is the stepping stone to what is to come, the magical growth within each of your hearts. The center of the UNiverse is not in the eye of the beholder, as that view can be distorted from all this we are here to help you heal, grow out of and move forward from, into the next phase of your evolution.
The heart center of each being is the focus now, as the LOVE you truly know now, comes from this place, the spot right where you think it hurts the most, is the place where it is the deepest for every Soul.
As we continue to guide you through the jungle of your old memories and emotions you attached to them, remember to turn within not against them. The ones who bring it all to the surface for you are here as your co-creator. It might seem off in the middle of it, but trust us when we say you all agreed to this. Way before you forgot that this is not a one-man show, but oneness is the focus as we move into the LOVE you all know. The TRUE, DIVINE LOVE we already talked about in the past, detached, free and uplifting for everyone in their innocence.
So now that we were able to connect and share this with you, continue to reach out with what you have to say about the life and light you have found under all those wounds. We are here to guide you and love you through it all, as nobody ever has to do this alone anymore.”
It is nice to have the guidance and help of my guides as at times it does become a little too much to try to explain experiences in ways that sound simple but empowering, especially a day after having an experience so draining. I did have one of those deep memories come to the surface and it was not the most pleasant one. You see I recognized what was about to happen, a day or two before I finally surrendered. The memories of a traumatic experience which I still don’t have a full picture of, as I buried most of it deep enough. But after a few years of intense healing and growing, I knew what I was about to go through.
I had a choice to ignore it and play it off like nothing is happening. I did try that and it didn’t help much as deep down I knew it had to come to an end. It had to be faced and healed if I want to be able to be present and recognize all the beautiful manifestation that is coming in its place. I had to CHOOSE not to keep denying its existence, but to face it and surrender to its darkness to come to the surface.
Trauma flashbacks truly suck and they can be scary, but luckily I have been here a few years ago with another wound, something horrific I endured before. Reliving any traumatic event can be traumatic in itself, and that is why I am so passionate about teaching the importance of knowing the true self. To be able to recognize when we are faced with a real threat or if it is old stories, wounds, and emotions coming to an end. The difference is huge and important to know so that we can choose to respond the best possible.
We have to do the inner work if we want to be in alignment with all that we need to know at each moment and recognize the signs for what we are going through.
A dangerous situation can bring us into fight or flight, that help us to know it is time to protect ourselves. However, a simple interaction with someone can trigger deep routed wounds which our body can respond to similar ways, activating our fight or flight or freeze response, making us believe that we are in imminent danger, while it is just something of old ready to surface and heal within ourselves.
We have to learn to differentiate by practicing self-care through the balancing of our Mind, Body, Spirit connection. So many amazing tools are available for everyone.
Daily self-care practice including meditation, journaling is a great way to work on this connection, next to anything that resonates with each person on their journey. Including therapy, if our situation calls for it. We are all unique and so are the ways we can take care of ourselves. No two people will benefit from the same routine the same way, and that is why I find it so important to practice and learn to trust our guidance system, our intuition, so each of us can KNOW what we resonate with and based on this knowing can choose what to try and implement into our lives.
What works for me will not work for everyone else, but with adjustments to a routine that resonates we can all create our unique self-care and self-love package.
It is just like going to a buffet and creating your plate; how you like it, what you enjoy and crave at the moment and using your own free will serving yourself.
To identify our triggers and recognize a wound that is ready to heal and be let go of, having a balanced Mind, Body and Spirit connection can be a key element. With this balance we have the ability to respond to what we are experiencing from a calm and confident space and reach for the tools we know will help us go through the process, be it reaching out to someone for help, meditation, journaling, breathing exercises, physical activities like yoga or walking, listening to music, or any other practice we have gifted ourselves through living a curious life of self-care and self-love.
Through a daily practice of attending to our well-being, we can continue to stay present, focused and aware when something comes up and allows us to heal, grow and transform just a little more by surrendering instead of resisting the process.
The more we choose to resist any healing the more the pain and discomfort will persist, causing us to miss out on the beauty available for us in the Here and Now.
It is not always a comfortable experience to remember and process old memories, but resisting it will cause even more discomfort leaving us drained and disconnected from all that truly matters, isolated from joy, peace, love and from Finding Your Freedom.